The Need 4 Relationships
I have spoken several times and have had podcast episodes on this topic: the need for relationships. This need for relationships is for us as fathers as well as for the social, mental, and physical health of our family. Whether we want to admit or not, humans are built for relationships. We cannot avoid them. And…we need them.
I am 100% aware that I am an introvert. I can exist around 2-3 people at a time and I am good. After spending time in a crown or a small group, I need time for myself to recharge. Yet, there are those in my family who live on relationships. They thrive when they are around people and energize and are energized from people. Although that is not me, I know that I am able to give and meet needs of others when I am around people. I am also aware that I usually get a lot from conversations I have with other people. People come from all walks of life and have insights that you would never attain had you not experienced them.
As I write this, I am finishing a book entitled, How to Know a Person. The Art of Seeing Others Deeply and Being Deeply Seen by David Brooks. It is an excellent read. I am getting so many insights from it. Some startling facts that he mentioned were: “The percentage of Americans who said they have no close friends quadrupled between 1990 and 2020” and “The General Social Survey asks Americans to rate their happiness levels. Between 1990 and 2018, the share of Americans who put themselves in the lowest happiness category increased by more than 50%.”
These are alarming statistics that should be addressed, personally. I often think of the number of true friendships that I have. Yes, I know I should engage more, but I also feel like I have 3-4 gents that I can run to about anything at anytime and have quality conversation. I hope that is the same for you.
It is also essential that we look into how many relationships our family members have. Understanding the social health of our family is essential to ensure that they too can have long-lasting relationships that build faith, courage, and trust. Although my children are adults, I still look into their lives in this area. Wherever your family is, take time to look at YOUR relationships first and then analyze theirs. Ask probing, but non-invasive questions. Some question suggestions could be:
‘Who have you been hanging out with lately?’
‘Describe a quality of your friend that you want to emulate.’
‘If you could take five of your friends to the beach (dinner, brunch, fishing trip, etc.), who would it be?’
Tapping into their minds without letting questions go overboard is a good way to learn more about your family’s friends.
I hope this helps. Know that I am still learning. I have No Off Season.